Parents are truly the first leaders we experience as we enter into the world. Parenthood is kind of like a leadership role thrown upon you with no choice; you’ve got to be a leader to this little human, and you’ve got to do it now. I imagine it’s scary especially for first time parents, because now they’re expected to be the omniscient, problem-solving guru.
Earlier in the year we discussed in class what makes a leader, and one definition I liked explained a good leader as one who lets their followers go and do what they know they are capable of, and also puts them in positions where they may not know as much. While that seems stressful, and perhaps a little counterproductive, it ultimately helps a person grow and learn more about themselves. This hands-off approach is, in my opinion, one of the most effective ones.
My mom & dad have recently take on this style of parenting. They know they raised me well, gave me all the life tips they could in the last 19 years, and trust my judgment. As my senior year of high school was coming to end, they let go of the firm grip they once had over my actions. They told me I could do whatever I wanted, and they would refrain from inserting their opinion. I am so thankful that in this important period in my life my parents have not coddled me to death and have allowed me to be an independent person. It has made my transition to college and young-adult life all that much easier. Additionally, my relationship with my parents is infinitely more enjoyable.
In talking to my friends, however, I notice that their experiences are much different. It would appear that their parents are still too involved-in and controlling-of their lives, even after they’ve spent almost a year away at university. What differences have you noticed with your parents/family members/guardians since transitioning to college?
April 3rd, 2013 at 3:50 pm
Yeah, I TOTALLY agree! I’m so thankful to my parents for allowing me to grow into a young adult, and letting me maneuver through life on my own. Coming to college, I’ve seen so many girls that have never had freedom or the independence to make decisions for themselves and college makes them go wild. Because I go to make decisions for myself, I learned to act wisely, because I never wanted my parents to be disappointed because of me.
April 5th, 2013 at 4:07 am
Coming to college with the additional distance of my parents, they have definitely become more protective, but they’ve done a great job. I am so thankful that over my growth they have trusted me enough to let me become this mature adult and explore life.